Phelps' relentless plunge to greatness is kind of transfixing. Did he win this race? Only the machine behind the wall knows.
Friday, August 15, 2008
Russia Prepares For Worst Season Ever (Again)
Russia's off-season training camp, which thus far has consisted mostly of searching in vain for a new home to relocate to and invading Georgia, has not gone well. In fact, it's gone so badly, Russian insiders fear that the Revolution may have to prepare for a record-setting 0-13 season.
"They don't pick until 19th overall," said season ticket holder Ivan Denisovitch. "By the middle of round 4, Department H, or I, or whatever the hell the clowns running the operation are called these days, will be scrambling to decide whether Jerry Porter or Devin Hester is more worthy of the #2 receiver position."
Still, team ownership remains optimistic. "We remain optimistic," said a statement issued through TASS.
Rumors continue to fly regarding the team's relocation to another country, state, continent or, God willing, planet. Adding to the mix are hints of a mysterious corporate entity thought to be pulling the strings in Red Square these days.
"I just wish there was a team I could root for, and be proud of," continued Denisovitch. "As it is, I'd rather be back in the gulag, betting against people with no teeth and jaundice on cockroach races than have to watch a single quarter of Russian football."
Discouraging team photos were also taken this summer.
"They don't pick until 19th overall," said season ticket holder Ivan Denisovitch. "By the middle of round 4, Department H, or I, or whatever the hell the clowns running the operation are called these days, will be scrambling to decide whether Jerry Porter or Devin Hester is more worthy of the #2 receiver position."
Still, team ownership remains optimistic. "We remain optimistic," said a statement issued through TASS.
Rumors continue to fly regarding the team's relocation to another country, state, continent or, God willing, planet. Adding to the mix are hints of a mysterious corporate entity thought to be pulling the strings in Red Square these days.
"I just wish there was a team I could root for, and be proud of," continued Denisovitch. "As it is, I'd rather be back in the gulag, betting against people with no teeth and jaundice on cockroach races than have to watch a single quarter of Russian football."
Discouraging team photos were also taken this summer.
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