Lynchburg JDs Week 4 lineup

QB: Kurt Warner
RB: DeAngelo Williams
RB: Jerious Norwood
WR: Terrell Owens
WR: Hines Ward
WR: Brandon Marshall
TE: Randy McMichael
K: Neil Rackers
Defense: Denver

JackStomp Week 4 Lineup

Week 4. Last place in the Rommel Division. 2nd worst record, but worst point total. Those friggin Russians score more than us.

All the prognosticators said that the two running backs I have are "Studs".... studs.... On their capable backs alone we should be able to atleast outscore the Criminals! No. Not the case.

To top it off, My #1 QB is on Bye, and my #2 is benched. I am left to start my #3 QB against one of the best D's in the league... not good.

I fear that Russia and The JackStomp will be competing for the #1 pick again... assuming one of us are not stupid enough to trade the fucking pick to Angola!

Come get some Celts!!!!

QB: JaMarcus Russell
RB: LaDanian Tomlinson
RB: Stephen Jackson
WR: Donald Driver
WR: Muhsin Muhammad
WR: Robert Meachem
TE: Zach Miller
K: Nate Kaeding
D: Arizona

Horde Lineup - Week 4

QB - Trent Edwards
RB - Matt Forte
RB - Earnest Graham
WR - Steve Smith
WR - Torry Holt
WR - Eddie Royal
TE - Tony Scheffler
K - Matt Prater
DEF - Tennessee

The Road To 0-13 Reaches The Quarter-Mile Marker

You know it's bad when you realize that over the last 8 years you've probably had to write two dozen posts that start with "Until we win a game, we're going to..." .

Instead, with a laser-like focus on an 0-13 season, we are going to let our lineup do the talking for us.

QB - Phil Rivers
RB - Darren McFadden
RB - Steve Slaton
WR - Larry Fitzgerald
WR - Greg Jennings
WR - Dwayne Bowe
TE - Heath Miller
K - Robbie Gould
D - Green Bay

Angola Week 4

Its well known that fans showing up to Wetback's games are only there for the cheap alcohol, the discount coupons to Mamacita's, or simply to cheer for the visiting team.

So to honor the fans, the Playahs have their nicknames in Spanish.


QB: Tony "Asesino Sonriente" Romo
RB: Adrian "Jesús Púrpura" Peterson (DNS Larry Johnson)
RB: Michael "La Hornilla" Turner
WR: Lee "Harvey" Evans
WR: DeSean "DeNovato" Jackson
WR: Chad "Eight Five" Johnson
TE: Kellen "Menor" Winslow
PK: Nick "Pequenito Poco" Folk
DEF: Buffalo "el 60% del tiempo, trabaja cada vez" Defense

Criminals week 4 lineup

Let's see if this all-'Skins team fails miserably in Dallas.

QB: Jason Campbell
RB: Clinton Portis
RB: Fred Taylor
WR: Santana Moss
WR: Santonio "Horrendous" Holmes
WR: DJ Hackett
TE: Bo Scaife
K: Rob Bironas
D: Minnesota

Celt's Week 4 Lineup

Q: What's black and full of holes?

A: Swiss shit.

Aaahhh... to try and navigate the swiss-shit that has become the Celt's roster.... who's healthy, who's worth the risk and why the hell do we even bother?

Fair warning to the Jackstomp; beware the sticky mess that will result from their stomping.

On to the misery...

QB Brian "Lord help me" Griese
RB Brian "Ouch, that hurts" Westbrook (DNP Chris Perry)
RB Correll "I got yo back" Buckkhalter
WR Anquan "Money talks" Boldin
WR Hank "Gimme da ball" Baskett
WR Donte "You gotta be kidding me" Stallworth (DNP Bryant Johnson)
TE Tony "The Man" Gonzalez
KI Josh "Busy B" Brown
DF Tampa Bay "Beg-anneers"

Here's hopin' for a miracle...

The_Chad

Wetbacks DFL Week 4 Lineup

NEW SASABE, MEXICO - After last weeks drubbing of the JDs, head coach Cheech Marin threw a victory siesta at his New Sasabe hacienda for the team. He presented the game ball to JT "Brotha From Anothah Motha" O'Sullivan for his performance. O'Sullivan was quick to point out that without the stifling defense, his performance would have been for nada. He then re-presented the game ball to the defense, and then told Ed Reed to "take it and run" (which he did last week for 6 pts.).

Back in the saddle this week is stud QB Drew "They Call Me The" Brees, who was pleasantly surprised to find out that the Wetbacks have added previous teammate Lance "Porn Star Name" Moore to the roster. "Nice." was all that Brees said.

An anonymous letter (written on 1-ply toilet paper) was received at the New Sasabe secretariat this week threatening pipe-bomb and plastic-fork-shank strikes on the Wetbacks players, and so security around Cruzar la Frontera Stadium has been beefed up. For the impending arrival of the Angola Pen Playahs, security has been increased in consultation with stadium authorities. Security personnel (read: rent-a-cops) have been deployed. Door frame metal detectors and CCTVs have been installed at various positions throughout the stadium grounds. Besides New Sasabe Police, several volunteers (read: transients and roach coach vendors) have been enlisted to keep a strict vigil (read: stay awake) in the stadium premises before, during, and after the game. These security measures will stay in place until the Playahs have left the New Sasabe / Mexico border.


And now the DFL Week 3 lineup for your New Sasabe Wetbacks:

QB - Drew Brees
RB1 - Marshawn Lynch
RB2 - Ryan Grant
WR1 - Jerricho Cotchery
WR2 - Chris Chambers
WR3 - Lance Moore
TE - Jason Witten
K - Phil "El Golpeador" Dawson
DEF - Jacksonville

Whoopass lineup - Week 4

2 Words for you all - Jugger. Naut.

QB: Cutler
RB: Barber
RB: Gore
WR: A. Johnson
WR: L. Coles
WR: V. Jackson
TE: G. Olsen
K: Suisham
D: Bears

Lynchburg JDs Week 3 lineup

With an ever sounding "Bragging Rights" to last weeks pick without a Defense, I bring you the almighty 3rd week lineup:
Drink up boys, were play'n the wetbacks again.

QB: Kurt Warner
RB: Joseph Addai
RB: Jerious Norwood
WR: Terrell Owens
WR: Hines Ward
WR: Brandon Marshall and if he DNS, Isaac Bruce
TE: Randy McMichael
K: Neil Rackers
Defense: Indianapolis

JackStomp Week 3 Lineup

This is so familiar. High draft picks not doing SHIT! Who wants LT? Any takers???? I am about to send his ass to that same shit hole prision the New Sasabe burrito vendor got sent to. Maybe the ass-raping will take his mind of his fucking toe!!!!! RUN THE BALL YOU FUCKTARD!!!!

QB: Matt Hasselbeck
RB: LaDanian Tomlinson
RB: Stephen Jackson
WR: Reggie Wayne
WR: Donald Driver
WR: Antwaan Randle-El
TE: Zach Miller
K: Nate Kaeding
D: Arizona

Don't laugh Jackson... you're next if you don't pull your head out of your ass!!!!

Angola Lineup Week 3

Hoping to rebound, here we go...


QB: Tony "Smilin' Assassin" Romo
RB: Adrian "Purple Jesus" Peterson (DNP Larry Johnson)
RB: Michael "The Burner" Turner
WR: Lee "Harvey" Evans
WR: DeSean "DeDumbass" Jackson
WR: "Rowdy" Roddy White
TE: Kellen "Junior" Winslow
PK: Nick "He's good" Folk
DEF: Buffalo "I love lamp" Defense

Dreamin Week 3 Lineup, by Mort

Hi again. Mort here. I just got off 2nd shift, and I put this together with another friend of mine, TJ. TJ is a nice gal, but she prefers hockey, so we did our best on this. Besides we were um, kinda busy.

QB: Eli Manning
RB: Reggie "Trimmin Kims" Bush
RB: Jonathan Stewart
WR: TJ "Hush Guy" Houshmanzadeh
WR: Plaxico Burress
WR: Braylon Edwards DNP:Derrick Mason
TE: Cris Cooley
PK: Puxatawney Phil Dawson
DF: New England Patriots

Criminals week 3 lineup

Peyton is starting to look, how-you-say, washed up.

QB: Peyton Manning
RB: Clinton Portis
RB: Lendale White
WR: Santana Moss
WR: Santonio Holmes
WR: Patrick Crayton
TE: Dallas Clark
K: Rob Bironas
D: Minnesota

Russian Week 3 Lineup Featuring "Brother" Jon Kitna!

That's right, the born-again Russian QB now has his own action figure!



Er, moving on:

QB - Brother Jon Kitna
RB - Darren McFadden
RB - Willie Parker
WR - Larry Fitzgerald
WR - Greg Jennings
WR - Wes Welker
TE - Heath Miller
K - Robbie Gould
D - Dallas

Wetbacks DFL Week 3 Lineup

NEW SASABE, MEXICO - This Sunday, the Wetbacks welcome the Lynchburg JDs in yet another chapter of the Liquor Bowl. In past years, alcohol has been replaced at Cruzar la Frontera Stadium with soft drinks and water for this game, however things have changed due to fan complaints. "I could nefer eenjoy American futbol without many cervezas and tequilas," wrote Diego Jose Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno Maria de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santisima Trinidad Martyr Patricio Clito Ruiz, a longtime Wetbacks fan. Thousands of such sentiments have been received by the Wetbacks organization via NSMS (New Sasabe Mail Service), email, and numerous bomb threats.

Alcohol will be made available 3 hours before and during the game inside the stadium, as well as after the game "until the kegs are dry." The visitor's locker room, however, will be left drier than a corn chip in a sandstorm. When questioned bout this, Wetbacks Information Minister Ron Jeremy explained to reporters that the Wetbacks organization would not pay for, nor supply, a team that has so many missing teeth with additional alcohol, seeing that they will most likely bring vats of sour mash whiskey along with them.

In other news, New Sasabe authorities have arrested Martin Gonzales de Barrabas Manera Demasiados Apellidos Cortez Jose Salazar y Chavez, a local roach-coach owner, for writing disparaging remarks about the Wetbacks. Chavez, who goes by the chick-magnet 'Net-handle "Magnolia Fan", recently posted written depictions of a graphic sexual nature pertaining to the Wetbacks. Former Jamaican drug-runner and current New Sasabe District Court Judge Bongo Scratch has set bail at 1,000,000 pesos ($94,103 USD). Chavez is currently being held in El Cárcel Prison with burrito and carne asada privileges suspended until sentencing.


And now the DFL Week 3 lineup for your New Sasabe Wetbacks:

QB - J.T. O’Sullivan
RB1 - Marshawn Lynch
RB2 - Kevin Smith
WR1 - Jerricho Cotchery
WR2 - Chris Chambers
WR3 - Amani Toomer
TE - Jason Witten
K - Jason "El Golpeador" Hanson
DEF - Baltimore

Whoopass Lineup - Week 3

Stearns County - Lake Wobegon and its environs are excited to welcome in the great, unwashed Horde to Stearns County Stadium this week. The ladies from the Blue Haired Friends with Benefits club sent early invites to the Horde in an effort to roll out the Welcome Wagon for the team. The Wagon was literally rolling (and rocking) outside the stadium, but the line that had formed outside the Wagon didn't seem to include any Horde members. We'll see how the Stearns County hospitality sits with the Mongols.

QB: Cutler
RB: Frank Gore
RB: Marion Barber
WR: A. Johnson
WR: C. Johnson
WR: V. Jackson
TE: Shockey
K: Gostkowski
D: Bears

To Magnolia Fan

Please check the the last 7 seasons in the DFL of the Russian Revolution for worst team ever.

~Love

Drew

Um, this might be helpful to you.

http://www.angermgmt.com/

Fuck Them Up Their Stupid Asses

The New Sasabe Wetbacks are the worst football team I have ever seen. Grant and Cotchery are stupid players, a couple of boners who spurt dumbass yards-per-carry/catch averages like a third rate Barry Sanders or Jerry Rice. Fuck The New Sasabe Wetbacks. Fuck them up their stupid asses.

~Magnolia Fan

Horde Lineup - Week 2

QB - Donovan McNabb
RB - Brandon Jacobs
RB - Earnest Graham
WR - Roy Williams
WR - Eddie Royal - dns Torry Holt
WR - David Patten
TE - Antonio Gates - dns Tony Scheffler
K - Kris Brown
DEF - Tennessee

Dreamin' Week 2 Lineup

"Ladies and gentlemen of the press, please, please be calm and seated. The Dreamin' staff has now fully recovered from their transatlantic tour, and have had time to study the players on the team. We made some non-stellar playcalls last week, which led to a a home loss. But, why think of football today? The Dreamin staff is off to the South Pacific next week, so we are all focused on that with little time for lineups or coaching, or even travelling with the team. So, without further ado, I'd like to hand over the lineup duties to our very capable, and multi lingual, corner Circle K clerk."

~Love, Drew

And now um, some gals in tight fitting leather and pretty colored hair clips asked me to look at this list and see who might put up some points for something called fantasy football. I asked my friend Lleweyen who does some of that, so he helped me put this together.

QB: Eli "Outperforming my Brother so far" Manning
RB: Thomas "Too Tall" Jones
RB: Reggie "Trims Kims" Bush
WR: TJ "Housh...Housh..." Houshmanzadeh
WR: Plaxico "Laxico" Burress
WR: Braylon "In a Can" Edwards
TE: Cris "Waving the Zorn Flag" Cooley
PK: Phil "Kicker" Dawson
DF: Pittsburgh "Schmeleand" Steelers

Uh, thank you. My name is Mort. And I want to say hey to my friend Lleweyen for helping me with this. And my other friend Nick. He dun brought me and Lleweyen a coke late last night while trying to figure out how to pronounce Houshmanzadeh.

Angola Week 2

Drunk is no way to write a post son...

QB: Tony "Smilin' Assassin" Romo
RB: Adrian "Purple Jesus" Peterson
RB: Larry "Raidah Stompin'" Johnson
WR: Lee "Harvey" Evans
WR: Marvin "Old Man" Harrison
WR: DeSean "DeAction" Jackson
TE: Kellen "Junior" Winslow
PK: Nick "He's a Kickin' Fool" Folk
DEF: Buffalo "I really enjoy a nice pair of slacks" Defense

Team JackStomp Week 2 Lineup

Another team chock full of underachievers... WTF! But somehow we managed a win last week. I wonder if the scoreboard operators were sauced up as badly as the JD's were. Must have been, because when the AZ D is the highest scoring player on the team you know something aint right.... WTF!!!


QB: Matt "Rogaine" Hasselbeck
RB: LaDanian "My Toe Hurts" Tomlinson
RB: Stephen "I'm a little farie like Michael" Jackson
WR: Reggie "WTF Happened" Wayne
WR: Antwaan "Garbage Time" Randle-El
WR: Donald "I Miss Brett" Driver
TE: Zach "The Other, Other, Other White Meat" Miller
D: Arizona "I wish we could play San Fran every week" Defense
K: Nate "LT's Toe Hurts" Kaeding


Bring it, BigCan!!!!

Lynchburg JDs Week 2 lineup

Coach, I told'm, more points not pints.
a little change will stir'm up.

QB: Kurt Warner
RB: Joseph Addai
RB: Jerious Norwood
WR: Terrell Owens
WR: Hines Ward
WR: Brandon Marshall
TE: Randy McMichael
K: Neil Rackers

Celt's Week 2 Lineup

After a 3 week tour of North America, we are back home with enough time to (hopefully) post a competitive lineup.
My apologies to Bigcanov for not being able to round up a competitive roster for last week's game, but hey, everyone can use a pre-season game once in a while.

For this week's venture into futility, we will start the following:

QB Ben Roethlisberger
RB Brian Westbrook
RB Julius Jones
WR Randy Moss
WR Anquan Boldin
WR Bryant Johnson
TE Tony Gonzalez
KI David Akers
DF Seattle


Hopefully not "Preseason, Week 2" instead.

C

Criminals Week 2 lineup

Awesome game last week. Holy effing crap. Yet again I pick an overrated piece-of-garbage defense. Big fat zero out of the Minnesota D? Fantastic.

QB: Peyton Manning
RB: Clinton Portis
RB: Lendale White
WR: Santana Moss
WR: Santonio Holmes
WR: Patrick Crayton
TE: Dallas Clark DNS Bo Scaife
K: Rob Bironas
D: Redskins

Whoopass lineup - Week 2 (revised)

Stearns County - A near riot ensued when Coach Noir posted his lineup for Week 2 of the DFL season, starting the Chicago freaking Bears on Defense. As the windows of his car were being pelted with spam, and some of it still inside the can, Noir said "This is effing Minnesota. We hate the effing Bears. What was I thinking?" The spam tossing dropped to a lower rate upon his announcement that a change would be made in the lineup.

In an unrelated note, the Blessed Church of the Vestigal Virgin is hosting a special Sunday "Breakfast on the Lawn", featuring all the eggs, pancakes, and spammed hash you can eat for $2.99. All are welcome.

QB: Cutler
RB: Gore
RB: Barber
WR: A. Johnson
WR: C. Johnson
WR: L. Coles
TE: Shockey
K: Gostkowski
D: GIANTS

Wetbacks DFL Week 2 Lineup

We really enjoyed having that first win last week, albeit it an empty one (but a dubya is a dubya). Unfortunately, we invade The Steppes this week to face our always-seem-to-destroy-our-season nemesis, The Nomadic Mongol Horde. If "Old Man" McNabb has another Superman-like performance, things could go bad for us in a hurry. One can only hope for a below average, stone-handed, blind, deaf, and dumb Torry Holt performance by the Mongols in general.

In other news, we have sent Marques "Namby Pamby" Colston to Super Weenie General Hospital so he can rehab his poor yittle thumby-wumby. Reportedly, the therapy involves using his deep rectal area for thumb massage.

Wuss.


And now the DFL Week 2 lineup for your New Sasabe Wetbacks:

QB - Drew Brees
RB1 - Ryan Grant
RB2 - Marshawn Lynch
WR1 - Jerricho Cotchery
WR2 - Chris Chambers
WR3 - Bernard Berrian
TE - Jason Witten
K - Adam "El Golpeador" Vinatieri
DEF - Jacksonville

Russian Lineup , Wk 2 + A Rant

Oh, look at that. We lost last week. Gee, none of us could see that coming. 0-1! We've started down the road to perfection, and the first step has been taken!

The only saving grace is that the usual Russian Bad Luck Regarding First Round Picks™ was transferred to Angola along with Russia's first-rounder, as Tom Brady was carried off the field screaming.

And you know what? Good. I don't care if it's insensitive, or mean, or whatever. Those douchebag Patriots fans can suck it. Too bad a bazillionaire is going to have to not --- horror! --- play football this year and stay home screwing his supermodel girlfriend. Boo-fucking-hoo. Belichick and his toadies can suffer in mediocrity like the rest of the league now, and maybe after three weeks of Matt Cassel the national media will stop shoving New Fucking England down our throats week after week. So yeah, I'm happy I don't have to hear anymore this year about St. Thomas of Brady. In fact, I think I'll buy me one of these:




Boy that felt good.

QB --- Brother Jon Kitna
RB --- Willie Parker
RB --- Laurence Maroney
WR --- Larry Fitzgerald
WR --- Greg Jennings
WR --- Dwayne Bowe
TE ---- Heath Miller
K------ Robbie Gould
D ----- Green Bay

Whoopass Lineup - Week 2

QB: Cutler
RB: Gore
RB: Barber
WR: A. Johnson
WR: C. Johnson
WR: L. Coles
TE: Shockey
K: Gostkowski
D: Bears

Bittersweet Start to Season

By Tyrone "Tookie" Samuels

Angola Free Press
Angola, LA – A solid start to the season as the Playahs rolled over perennial league doormat and cross-country rival Alameda, 137 to 63. Angola’s ground game was hitting on all cylinders, lead by Michael Turner’s sensational 220 yards and two TD’s. QB Tony Romo was workman like, spreading the ball around, and hitting favorite targets like Kellen Winslow Jr five times for 47 yards and a TD. Another solid performance was turned in by wideout Nate Burleson, with five catches for 60 yards and a TD. But Burleson succumbed to a knee injury late in the game that will cause him to miss the rest of the season. Word is that the club reached an injury settlement with him, cut him a check, and released him in to the gator infested swamps. We wish Nate luck.

More tragedy struck when GQ QB Tom Brady, who did not start due to a prior spa appointment that conflicted with the scheduled kickoff time, was injured shortly after arriving at the stadium. As Brady made his way from the locker room to the bench, he made a poor decision and flashed a smile at a star struck cheerleader, who promptly swooned, falling into his left knee, rupturing his ACL and MCL (apparently made of papier-mâché) and ending his season. As for Brady’s status with the team, The Barrah commented, “we’ve got too much guaranteed money tied up in Tom to dispo… eh… give him the kind of settlement we gave Mr. Burleson.”

And this was only week one, it promises to not get any easier down the road.

Trades?

Any takers for goddamn Tavaris Jackson? Dude can't make a clutch throw to save his momma's life.

Russian Lineup, Wk 1

The Road to 0-13 starts in New Sasabe! We here in Red Square are... oh jesus, nevermind, here's our starting lineup for the first week and we'll see what happens. Christ.

QB -- Jon Kitna (Oh, good God.)

RB --- Laurence Maroney

RB --- Darren McFadden

WR --- Wes Welker

WR --- Larry Fitzgerald

WR --- Greg "This Is What Things Have Come To, I'm Starting A Packer And A Raider On Opening Day" Jennings

TE --- Heath Miller

K --- Robbie Gould

D --- Dallas

Angola Week 1

Angola Free Press
Angola, LA – Football fever is once again running rampant in the swamps of Louisiana, as fans get ready for yet another exciting and unpredictable DFL season. The Playahs embark on this season looking to defend their title, after a remarkable run to the DFL Championship last season. Spirits are high amongst the general population. So much so, that shankings and rapes are down 13% and 11.5% respectively.

Opening against Alameda, a team that beat them twice last year, Angola hopes the following lineup will get the job done:

QB: Tony "Smilin' Assassin" Romo
RB: Adrian "Purple Jesus" Peterson
RB: Michael "The Burner" Turner
WR: Nate "Hasselbeck has to throw to someone" Burleson
WR: Marvin "Old Man" Harrison
WR: "Rowdy" Roddy White
TE: Kellen "Junior" Winslow
PK: Nick "He's a kickin' fool" Folk
DEF: San Diego "German for Whale's Vagina" Defense

Whoopass Week 1 lineup

Stearns County, Minnesota. - As global warming continues apace, the mosquitos in Stearns County are abuzz with thoughts of the sweltering beginning to the DFL season. The stoic germans and norwegians of the County have kept their expectations on an even keel leading into this season. Otherwise, given the heat this summer, emotions could overwhelm the simple folk of the county and people would be killing one another with their homemade noodle makers, or some such devices. Below is the first lineup on what promises to be another successful campaign (rumor has it anyway):

QB: Jay Cutler
RB: M. Barber
RB: F. Gore
WR: Andre Johnson
WR: Calvin Johnson
WR: L. Coles
TE: J. Shockey
K: Gostkowski
D: Giants

California Lineup Week 1

Fresh off the adventures in London, and lots of pub crawls, and very twisty Kent roads, California is probably ready to submit a lineup for Week 1 of this fresh season. Unfortunately, all of our official Dreamin' papers were lost in transit. Or we used them as napkins at a pub. Or the "football" players that we tried to recruit wiped their asses with it. We believe it was the latter.

Fuck, who are we playing this week? I don't know. I"m just submitting some players.

QB: Eli "I drafted this guy again? Fuck!!" Manning
RB: Reggie "Run You Bastard" Bush
RB: Thomas "Do I Start?" Jones
WR: Plaxico "Permanent Gimp" Burress
WR: Braylon "Newly Gimped" Edwards
WR: TJ "I Knew I Retained 3 WR"s" Houshmanzadeh
TE: Cris "Dude Knows Fantasy Football" Cooley
PK: Phil "Can I use Punxsutawney or is that trademarked" Dawson
DF: New England "vs. the hapless Chefs" Patriots

Oh. I"m playing...the Horde. Well, that bodes poorly to start my season so unprepared. Maybe they'll get lost on the way to California. May I offer you Yuma? please?

~love
Drew

Wetbacks Week 1 Lineup

NEW SASABE, MEXICO - Expectations run high this year after last season's disappointing finish. To start off this season, the Wetbacks face perennial DFL super loser Russian Revolution in the pleather-upholstered confines of Cruzar La Frontera Stadium. "Wannabe" Willie Parker has reverse-defected to the Rev this year, thinking that the injury bug won't be able to find him in the desolate gulags surrounding Red Square. Coach "Cheech" Marin isn't bothered in the least. "Sure, Little Willie was a Wetbacks mainstay for so long, but really, the manteca had to be cut." Indeed, with the young backfield of Marshawn Lynch and Ryan Grant, the Wetbacks are poised for a "malo-a-primer" turnaround that the DFL will be talking about for years to come.


The Revolution come into New Sasabe with, uh, well, with some players that drop, bobble, and fumble the ball. The stunning array of, umm, water boys they carry is a testament to the great - no - the extrordinary commitment to aquatic engineering the Russians are so well known for.


And now the DFL Week 1 lineup for your New Sasabe Wetbacks:

QB - Drew Brees
RB1 - Marshawn Lynch
RB2 - Kevin "Silent Bob" Smith
WR1 - Marques Colston
WR2 - Jerricho Cotchery
WR3 - Joey Galloway
TE - Jason Witten
K - Adam "El Golpeador" Vinatieri
DEF - Jacksonville

BTW, I'm really impressed by Donald Driver being able to play WR and TE. GO JACKSTOMP!!

Lynchburg JDs Week 1 lineup

Lets Ready to "StompJack"

QB: Kurt Warner – DNS – Carson Palmer
RB: Joseph Addai
RB: DeAngelo Williams
WR: Terrell Owens
WR: Isaac Bruce
WR: Hines Ward
TE: Todd Heap – DNS – Randy McMichael
K: Neil Rackers
Defense: Indianapolis

Horde Lineup - Week 1

QB - Donovan McNabb
RB - Brandon Jacobs
RB - Earnest Graham
WR - Torry Holt
WR - Roy Williams
WR - Kevin Walter
TE - Tony Scheffler
K - Kris Brown
DEF - Tennessee

Criminals Week 1 Lineup

I drafted a bunch of worthless receivers again. And those running backs are pretty meh. And bursitis boy Manning will be as mobile as me, the Corpse of Al Davis.

QB: Payton Manning
RB: Clinton Portis
RB: Fred Taylor
WR: Santonio Holmes
WR: Santana Moss
WR: Patrick Crayton
TE: Dallas Clark
K: Rob Bironas
D: Minnesota

JackStomp Week 1 Lineup

Not to be out done by The Celts... I decided to not only have a lame opening day post, I decided to have a lame opening-day lineup too!!! Have fun with this one boys:


QB: Matt Hasselbeck
RB: LaDanian Tomlinson
RB: Stephen Jackson
WR: Reggie Wayne
WR: Antwaan Randle-El
WR: Donald Driver
TE: Donald Driver
D: Arizona
K: Nate Kaeding

Celt's Opening Roster for Week 1

Been travelling too much to make an effort at a reasonable post.....

QB Ben Roethlisberger
RB Brian Westbrook
RB Julius Jones
WR Randy Moss
WR Anquan Boldin
WR Ted Ginn Jr
TE Tony Gonzalez
KI David Akers
DF Seattle

... sorry to start the season so lamely.

The_Chad